The Space Where Life Is Happening

My favorite firework is a burst of massive gold flecks that take over the sky. It is a hopeful flame. It leaves a stamp of remembrance, before dissolving into a grey cloud of smoke. It’s a metaphor for healing after trauma.

First, darkness engulfs us. Then, the light twinkles through. It’s a bold moment of awe and enough to take your breath away. The fleeting beauty reminds us that joyful moments are to be savored.

Maybe the light comes from friendships. 
Maybe it comes from family. 
Maybe it’s found in love. 
Maybe it’s the space where life is happening.

Whatever it is, it’s found where light pierces the darkness. It’s found in the moments of, “Are you ok?” and “Do you want to talk about it?”

There is a space between “Take care of yourself,” “I’m worried about you,” or “What does the doctor say?” It’s the space before doubt prevents you from crossing a line to stop and say, “It’s not my place to interfere” or “It’s not my business.” There’s a blurry pocket where boundaries melt away, and the diffusion of responsibility is murky.

This is the place where differences are made.

We celebrate life’s highs , but we get very quiet when we’re in a low. We don’t want to burden others. We don’t want to give away our Achilles heel. We retreat for self-preservation. We keep a small circle that cuts us off from connection. The higher we climb, or the lower we fall — some solo missions are meant for an awakening, For it’s in this place that bridges collapse or become reinforced.

Life is filled with highs and lows. The people you want by your side are those who are willing to get into the trenches with you and help you get unstuck.

How freeing would it be to be honest instead of making idle chit-chat? But - fair warning - not all can handle heavy. That’s ok. When you’re in the trenches - find a commonality. Be with peopole who want more for you - and can grieve with you. We’re all in something.

We meet people and immediately offer positive, light banter. “My kid won the game!”…“My daughter just had a baby.” …“We got a puppy.” …“We bought a house!” …“We went to that new restaurant.”…”We just got back from {beautiful vacation spot}.”

Sharing celebrations is healthy ,  and, so is talking about the fragility of life. Talk about the coincidences. Talk about the spaces we don’t talk about because it is an overshare.

If you ever want to talk about heavy, saddle up and talk to me…overshare is a love language I am fluent in. Let’s become comfortable with the uncomfortable. Let’s learn to navigate heavy topics. What might change if we talked about what weighed on our hearts?

Maybe validation will provide reassurance.
Maybe a bond will be built.
Maybe a soul will be healed.
Maybe a lesson will be learned.
Maybe a spirit will be ignited.
Maybe a friendship will be kindled.

So what’s holding you back? Let fight club bring you together. There is no competition — your dash is yours and yours alone.